if you’re ever in need of new profile pic you know which team to hire 😎🌸🎥
So this happened on facebook today….
Thank god someone said it. You cannot fuck a vagina loose yo. Anatomy doesn’t work like that.
people that do not understand vaginas should not be allowed near one
"these days it’s true though!"
TELL ME JACOB
TELL ME OF THE OLDEN DAYS
TELL ME OF THE 1930s WHEN VAGINAS WERE AS TIGHT AS AN ANUS
TELL ME OF HOW THE FEMALE OF THE SPECIES HAVE DEGRADED INTO HORRIBLE SEEPING MONSTERS WITH GAPING CAVERNS THESE DAYS.
TELL ME OF YOUR WISDOM.
last night i had a dream that the world was ending and everyone started raiding stores for supplies and i literally grabbed all the black eye liner they had and left with nothing else
DreamWorks Animation Studios has announced the addition of a black female heroine (gasp!) to its repertoire of white dogs, green ogres, snails, Neanderthals, pandas, white people and Antz. In doing so, it joins an elite club consisting of … well, nobody.
Not one major Hollywood studio has released a 3D animated feature starring a black character.
SHES VOICED BY RIHANNA
my name is natalie and i’m fat. i’ve been more fat than i am now. i have been less fat. i’ve been the same fat. i’m fat from the side, fat from the front, fat from the back…you get the point.
fat girls have been lied to over and over in many ways our whole fat existences - told that we are restricted to certain styles/trends of clothing because anything too tight/short/revealing isn’t ‘flattering’. told that we should be glad to be hit on/cat-called by creepy men because hey, at least it’s something, right?! told that the world isn’t open to us and that we can’t be incredible creatures because we’re fat. told that we’re ugly/undesirable/weak/stupid/disgusting. told that we don’t deserve to be loved…or even to live.
it’s not true. none of it is true.
people ask me often - “i hate myself. how do you do it?” it’s simple.
one day, i decided that i was worth greatness, whatever size i was or wasn’t.
i wish i could go back to awkward, shy 13 year old me, look her dead in the eye and tell her that she. is. perfect. tell her that she can go anywhere, be anyone, wear anything and that she will always be important and will never, ever, ever be merely ‘the fat girl’.
i won’t drown in sweat in texas summers to cover my fat arms in sweaters or shield my thunder thighs from the spring breeze just because you don’t want to see them. my fat arms and thunder thighs have always been here for me when much of the world wasn’t. i won’t be beat down by people who do not care if i cry myself to sleep at night.
my mom has always told me that i am my biggest fan and ya know what?
you’re allowed to feel good. don’t let anyone take that away from you.
This was recorded by the Portsmouth Sinfonia in an experiment where all the members of the orchestra would swap instruments with each other and attempt to play them to the best of their ability.
favorite things about this
- literally all the brass starts to get the hang of it and then the crescendos happen and everyone is like FUCK FUCK FUCK??? FUCK. JUST. BLOW RLY HARD.
- the strings are lazy but also the same. like u can tell a lot of the ppl w/ the stringed instruments may already basically know how to play stringed instruments. like there’s definitely a section at the beginning where you hear a good portion going “oh yeah this is like. a smaller/bigger version of what i do.”
- all you hear of any woodwinds is just “pffffttt??? pFFFTTTT???? PFFFFFTTTT I SAID PFFFFTTTT!!!!!” bc woodwinds are fucking HARD and you hear after like the first crescendo half of them just give up. they give up. they’re done. fuck this it tastes weird and my lips hurt.
- that trumpet. that person is fucking TRYING man they fucking GOT this. they may not have figured out notes but they figured out LOUD and they GOT this.
I JUST DIED
i’m in LOVe with my last selfie and i wanted to make it my profile pic but i can’t let myself have another selfie profile pic what a dilemma